...or in this case, her spinach bagel melt from lunch.
So I got this bright idea to join in the boot camp workout my co-worker Lisa's brother-in-law does every summer. I've been losing weight somewhat steadily the last month or so, and I was under the clearly disillusioned impression that this would be a great kick in the ass to my workout routine.
Oh it was a kick in the ass alright. A steel toed boot right to my posterior by the one and only Roy*
(who, due to his choice in head wear yesterday, will be referred to for the undetermined future as Major Payne).
The two laps around Buddy Attick Park quickly turned into one lap real fast once Major Payne realized that we all sucked at life, particularly cardiovascular exercise.
But that didn't stop him did it. No. The PAYNE continues.
After the 1.5 mile run/walk came 213902134.79 lunges, side steps, and step ups. Major Payne boot camp continued to live up to it's billing, as he was screaming and yelling "to" us motivational Dr. Phil-celebrity-fit-club-esque slogans like "DREAMERS DREAM, DOERS DO!" and "WANT IT MORE THAN LIFE!"
Thank the good lord that I actually didn't pass out last night during the workout, otherwise I would've never heard the end of it.
But unfortunately, while I didn't lose consciousness, I did in fact lose something else.
My lunch.
That's right. I made it through the entire workout and cool down without any major major problems. But in the parking lot, in front of 3 relative strangers, a coworker, and the man in the Good Humor truck, my Bagel Place lunch paid me a conjugal visit. And not a consentual one.
Major Payne couldn't have been more proud. Cheering me on and pouring ice water on my back to make me feel less ashamed of my body's inability to cope with rigorous physical exercise of this nature.
I'm just glad we didn't do this on campus on McKeldin Mall like he wanted to. Otherwise I'm sure some student who I denied for in-state tuition would've pointed and laughed at me telling me that revenge is a dish best served warm with a side of lunges.
And today we do it all. over. again.
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
1 comment:
Wow! thats a crazy story. I think its a good sign that your body decided to "tell" you that it didn't like being physically abused, even though it didnt choose to tell you in the best way.
Although, one of these days when you are super buff and running laps like a pro, you can look back at this day and laugh.
Plus, one thing I've learned while being the gimpy girl who cant walk is to be thankful for what our bodies are capable of, even if it isn't up to our own "standards". Now that I can barely walk, I realize how fortunate I have been to be able to walk, run, frollick through the registrars office in the past. So keep those spirits up! And drink lotsa water.
Sarah
Post a Comment